As they say “The greatest glory in living lies not in never failing, but in rising every time we fail…”
I was born in 1981 in a conservative Marwari middle class family in Burrabazar, Kolkata. Our home was extremely small, just two rooms with an asbestos roof in a building where all residents on the floor shared common toilets. Those two rooms were everything for us…kitchen, bedroom, study room and living room.
In that small space lived my parents, my grandmother, my elder brother and me. Money was limited, but the values in that house were priceless.
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My childhood was actually very beautiful. I had many friends in the building and we all grew up together. Every evening the building compound became our playground. We played cricket, badminton and many outdoor games until it became dark. Most families in the building were struggling financially, some even poorer than ours, but life still felt amazing. We did not have luxury, but we had innocence, friendship and joy.
As we grew older, many of my friends slowly started developing bad habits and studies stopped being a priority for them. My mother noticed this very early and became extremely strict with me. At that time I sometimes felt she was too strict, but today I realise she was protecting my future.
She always taught me to stay on the right path, remain disciplined, maintain cleanliness in life and focus on studies. One line she told me stayed in my heart forever…
“Never become a beggar of money in life. Become someone capable of giving.”
My grandmother also shaped my thinking deeply. She taught me to believe in God, respect elders and remain humble, because of their constant efforts, I eventually became the only graduate among my childhood friends from our building during that era.
I studied at Shree Maheshwari Vidyalaya in Burrabazar, and later somehow managed to get admission into Bhawanipore College.
College life was completely different from the conservative environment where I had grown up. Many of my college friends came from well to do families. Life there was vibrant and exciting. We spent hours discussing movies, dreams and life, and I was learning so many new things. Life was taking a completely new shape, and many boys and girls became my friends because of my charming personality and looks.
On 15 January 2000, during a tuition picnic, I met a girl named Shipra, who was studying in Class 12 at that time.
That day unknowingly became one of the most important days of my life.
We became very good friends almost instantly. I started sharing every little story of my life with her my college life, my friends, my experiences, my struggles and my dreams.
Even today we celebrate 15 January as our Friendship Day.
In the year 2001 me and my family shifted to our new home where we are residing till now.
After my B.Com exams in 2002, the pressure to earn money became very high, so I joined a home loan DSA on a variable salary basis, which meant no work, no pay.
On the very first day after training I was sent to Dum Dum Metro station to distribute home loan pamphlets. For a Bhawanipore College boy who cared about reputation and image, it was a harsh reality check.
The next day again Dum Dum Metro, then Sealdah station, then Tollygunge Metro.
Inside my mind there was always one fear what if some college friend saw me doing this?
But slowly I realised something important:
There is dignity in every honest work.
I worked extremely hard distributing pamphlets, collecting home loan leads, i went to different property builder’s and brokers of Kolkata asking home loan leads and converting them into business.
In July 2002, I earned ₹3,500 in my first month.
Exactly one year later, in July 2003, I earned ₹35,000 in a single month and became the highest home loan seller in my office.
Life suddenly became exciting. The year 2004 became one of the most beautiful phases of my life. I was earning well, receiving awards and enjoying life with friends.
Weekends meant movies, parks and outings with friends and Shipra. Every night I shared the entire story of my day with her. Those were magical days.
Then one day Shipra told me something that shook me deeply.
Her family had selected a professor from Lucknow as a prospective groom for her marriage, and discussions had already started.
After hearing this, I started thinking day and night about how I would survive without my best friend the person with whom I shared every emotion of my life.
I started having sleepless nights.
Finally I realised that I was deeply in love with her.
I gathered the courage and proposed to her. Initially she refused because we belonged to different communities, but I kept convincing her from 10 pm till almost 5 am in the morning.
Finally she said yes.
After a long struggle with our families, we got married in 2006.
After our marriage we went to Vaishno Devi to seek the blessings of Maa Vaishno Devi and start a new chapter of our life.
In 2007, our elder son Darsh was born. He came into our life like a blessing and we were completely mad after him. His first walk, his first words, his first day at school, every moment felt magical for us. Watching him grow day by day was one of the happiest phases of our family life.
In 2008, the global recession hit and the home loan industry collapsed. Banks stopped giving loans and I lost my job.
I went for many interviews but I always told the truth that I had started my career distributing pamphlets for home loan leads. Probably after hearing this, no one hired me.
Life became extremely difficult.
I did not even have ₹2,500 for Darsh’s vaccination and we depended on my parents for food.
Because I could not get a job, I took a loan and started a cloth manufacturing business, but the business lasted only five to six months and failed.
Now I had no income and a EMI on my head.
Seeing me struggling, my elder brother gave me an opportunity in his insurance business. I joined him and started working really hard. I used to prepare quotations, distribute them, call clients, follow up and convert the business. During that period I learned the insurance business from the ground level and added significant value to the business. I worked extremely hard again.
In January 2011, our second son Garv came into our life like another blessing. Our family now felt complete. Darsh was already the center of our world, and with Garv’s arrival our home became even more lively and joyful. Garv also seemed to bring a lot of good luck for me. Around the same time my work started growing rapidly and the business began blooming like never before and i repaid my loan as well from my savings.
Life was looking amazing again. I had two adorable sons, a loving wife, and things were finally moving in the right direction.
Business grew so much that in March 2012, I generated earnings of more than ₹7 lakh. On my birthday in May 2012, I took my first flight, spending around ₹24,000, and went to Vaishno Devi to thank Maa Vaishno Devi for the success.
But life is like an ECG…it never moves in a straight line.
Just three days after returning, my life took the biggest downward turn again.
I was suddenly terminated.
My friendly nature became my enemy. I had built strong relationships with insurance managers and clients, and a fear developed that one day I might take over their business.
And overnight, I was out.
A dark phase began.
I had two children, a wife and no source of income. Once again I had to depend on my father even for feeding my family.
The thought that kept killing me from inside was this:
Shipra could have married an educated professor from Lucknow, but instead she chose me.
And there I was, feeling like a loser, unable to feed my family.
One day after a strong fight at home, I went straight to an underground metro station.
I stood on the platform waiting for the train.
My phone started ringing.
It was Shipra.
She called again and again but I ignored the calls.
The metro train was about to arrive in less than a minute.
As I stood there ready to jump, I suddenly picked up the phone just to say one final goodbye.
Shipra was crying.
She said,
“Please don’t go… what will I do without you? We will face every struggle of life together.”
Those words stopped me.
I stepped back.
That moment saved my life
On 22 May 2012, I started my business again from zero.
For months I worked from footpaths and tea stalls, walking long distances distributing insurance quotations.
Once when I went to give a quotation, a lady even released her dog to chase me away.
But I kept moving forward.
I built my business on one principle:
Service first.
Whenever clients had claim problems, I stood with them. Sometimes when genuine claims were rejected, I even paid from my own pocket to support them.
Clients started trusting me.
They began referring their friends and relatives.
Then I took a big risk and rented an office for ₹25,000 per month, built my team and created departments for new business, renewals, back office and claims.
Slowly success started coming.
Then one day I received an email that I had qualified for an award trip to Dubai with my wife.
That was my second country outside India.
When I landed in Dubai, I remembered the boy who once distributed pamphlets at metro stations.
That moment made me realise something powerful:
Life can truly change if you refuse to give up.
That award trip awakened a new passion inside me travelling the world.
I started travelling to different parts of the world, some trips from my own funds, and some through insurance company awards.
Soon I had travelled to around 57 countries.
Then one day I decided to dream even bigger.
I decided to travel to all the 7 continents of the world.
But the 7th continent Antarctica was extremely difficult. It was remote, expensive and time consuming.
Still I broke my fixed deposit and paid for the Antarctica expedition.
On 16 November 2022, I started my journey.
From Buenos Aires to Ushuaia, and then across the legendary Drake Passage.
The ocean became wild with 10 meter waves. The ship shook violently for two days the famous Drake Shake.
Then Antarctica appeared.
Massive glaciers, floating icebergs and endless white mountains.
On 23 November 2022, I stepped onto the 7th continent Antarctica, the last part of the world.
Antarctica is unlike any other place on Earth. It is the coldest, driest, windiest and most untouched continent on our planet. Nature there is raw, pure and completely wild. There are no cities, no roads and no permanent human population only ice, wildlife and endless silence.
During the expedition we explored the Antarctic Peninsula by zodiac boats.
We saw penguin colonies, seals resting on ice and Antarctic birds flying above us
A giant whale surfaced beside our zodiac boat and jumped out of the water, creating a massive splash.
Two days later a 90 nautical mile storm hit us, followed by a heavy snowstorm.
We also visited Deception Island, an active volcanic island where fire meets snow.
The icebergs formed into perfect arches, towers and sculptures, shaped so beautifully that it almost looked like nature itself was an artist.
Standing there holding the Indian flag, my entire life flashed before my eyes.
From Burrabazar…
to Antarctica.
My journey has taught me one lesson.
If you dream big, work hard and never give up, life can change in unimaginable ways.
As Shah Rukh Khan beautifully said:
“Kehte hain agar kisi cheez ko dil se chaho,
toh poori kaynat use tumse milane ki koshish mein lag jaati hai.”
And when I look back at my life from a small house in Burrabazar to standing on the 7th continent of the world I truly feel my journey is living proof of those words.
Today the theme of my life is captured in this song:
“Har ghadi badal rahi hai roop zindagi,
chhaav hai kabhi kabhi hai dhoop zindagi,
har pal yahan jee bhar jiyo,
jo hai samaa kal ho na ho.”
Dream big.
Keep moving forward.
Because if a boy from a small house in Burrabazar can change his life…
anyone can…
I am really thankful to my late Grand Mother, My Father and specially My Mother
My Wife, My both Son
My friend Partha and Kishore da and all who have supported me in my hard times and to my Elder brother who gave me the opportunity when I needed it the most and to Vaishno Devi Ma, through every phase of my life one thing has always remained constant my faith in Maa Vaishno Devi. Even today I visit her four times every year, and I truly believe that hard work, faith and her blessings have shaped my journey.
Ram Gopal Kothari 